losing all hope « on: June 06, 2017, 08:23:44 am »
I am losing hope to recover. Even if I am only fighting for such a short time compared to all of you.
I can handle it all, but not the insomnia.
I thought things were getting a bit better, I slept 17 hours last week. But the past 3 days I slept NOTHING. I feel relaxed, still stay awake, heart pounding, night sweats etc.
I am going to lose my job over this, my social life is already nothing for months.
Sure, I can still try remeron, but I feel I am masking the problem only by taking medication. And what if I take it for a while and have to cut back on that eventually, then I get rebound insomnia from that too? And I just really get depressed if I gain weight. I already gained a lot past years. My weight is healthy now, but I don’t want any more.
I need to get to work (interacting with a lot of people and making decisions). I took some time off, but it didn’t help with the insomnia at all.
I lost all hope for a good (normal) life.
Sorry, to complain, but I am crying my eyes out here….