After 39 months of post-taper hell 68-year-old wants back on Xanax so he can live again

Better Off, Really?
« on: November 07, 2017, 05:58:24 pm »

[Buddie]

Well, I am 68. Off 13 years of benzos for 39 months now. To say this has been hell is being kind. I can’t think of a strong enough word. So, in the past years I seldom sleep. This has led to severe depression, extreme sadness, no life,no hope. I have aged externally and internally exponentially. Given my age I am believing now I would have been better off staying on. I know many heal, and I also know some do not. I am just venting here. I realize most comments will be stay strong and don’t give in and you will heal. I felt that way for many months and years. No more.

So, I am giving this through February. If after that I am not better, I am going back on and buying myself whatever good weeks or months I can grab. I can’t take years more of this. I see some have been 5 or more years struggling. Maybe if I were younger. I didn’t work 30 years and save money to now stay home and cry and hope. Which is worse really, no life or a short time of living again. Hmmmmm….

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