intrusive memories post withdrawal anyone?
« on: December 28, 2014, 05:49:42 pm »
I have decided to start a thread on intrusive thoughts as a good buddy of mine on here suggested that’s what might be happening to me.
I convinced myself in 2004 that I had a disorder called “Electro Sensitivity” this is a rare condition where some poor souls get unpleasant symptoms from electrical appliances.
I know of one woman who lived in a caravan in a farmers field to get away from the electricity.
Anyway I had some of the symptoms of this condition in 2004 and convinced myself I had it and started to avoid electrical appliances as much as possible.
We switched the electric off for 6 months and lived with candles and gas. My doc gave me lorazepam to cope with this lifestyle and I soon forgot about this illness and realised I didn’t have it at all (I had been in electricity for 30 years it had never harmed me). I carried on with normal life and forgot all about it.
I stayed on the lorazepam for 6 years until I reached tolerance at 9mg per day and had to withdraw. I went through withdrawal anxiety and the memories of the electro sensitivity returned and I felt very fearful of electrical appliances again. I managed to conquer this fear with exposure therapy and it went away again.
After being off lorazepam for 18 months my doc reinstated me on 30mg diazepam per day for withdrawal symptoms (not electric that had gone). The diazepam did nothing to help and he told me to withdraw 5mg a month and jump off at 7.5mg. I did as he said and now believe I am in a severe withdrawal syndrome (much worse than the lorazepam withdrawal) and the memory and fear of electricity has returned again at a much more intense level than ever.
I have been thinking about this as a phobia returning due to the absence of the drug or the rebound effect, but I now wonder could my buddie be right could this be intrusive memories and thoughts caused by withdrawal. Maybe the exposure therapy didn’t help last time? Maybe the intrusive thoughts and memories got better as withdrawal progressed.
I would love to hear from anyone who has any views on this or from anyone who has maybe gone through something similar (I doubt anyone else was afraid of electricity) but anything else that has bad memories or fears come back during withdrawal and that has got well again I would really appreciate hearing from you.
I know I have posted this story on lots of forums but I want as many replies as possible. I really need the hope.
Sorry for such a long post. There is a lot to tell.
Many thanks reading
Re: intrusive memories post withdrawal anyone?
« Reply #1 on: December 28, 2014, 06:27:16 pm »
I am hoping that someone who has or has had intrusive thoughts can answer this post.