Death by brainwashing: Benzos bad, cigarettes good

Can I still smoke cigarettes?
« on: October 28, 2016, 09:36:37 pm »

[Buddie]

Im sure this question has been asked a thousand times on here but Im a newbie to benzobuddys. Can I smoke a little? I was smoking half a pack daily. Stopped ct when I found out was withdrawing from K. Now Im dying for 2 or three smokes a day. I know i should just stay off them but whats the info on their effect on withdrawals? Thanks everyone. You guys make this bad trip better!

After thirty years addict wants off benzo merry-go-round

30 year Headache!
« on: October 16, 2016, 01:09:45 pm »

[Buddie]

In 1986 I was prescribed Ativan…….In 1995 Diazepam was substituted. until the last year I was unable to come of Benzos. This time last year I was on 40mg of Diazepam daily ( Taken in one go in the morning ) I was told by the local GP surgery I had to come off them. What staggers me is the lack of information, total lack of support. I have done my own research. Phoned a helpline in Bristol. Presented an ignorant GP with tapering guidelines. X wanted me to cut from 15mg to 20mg in less than 2 weeks…The withdrawal was horrendous and totally ruined my Christmas and that of other family members. X Told me I was not suffering from Withdrawal 18 days later and told me I was depressed……Giving me anti-depressant medication.”016 has seen me totally on my own try to withdrawal…I am now down to 8mg and am horrified to feel so awful on trying to cut by 1mg every 2 weeks. I live with daily tension headaches and have had them since taking Ativan years ago…they hav3 never gone away. I just want to share with others anything that can be helpful and also to top feeling so alone in this daily struggle. This last week has been one of the worst weeks of my whole life…..Thank you […]

Pill-crazed hophead eats handfuls of benzos in search of nirvana

Major setback to hell.
« on: October 08, 2016, 09:03:51 pm »

[Buddie]

Hi friends

I’ve just done the most stupid thing. I’ve been pretty stable on 5mg Lorazepam for 3 weeks now.

I was just about to take my 5mg and accidentally found a supply of Valium that my partner was hiding from me. I’ve had some bad news today and my anxiety/stress has been off the scale all day.

I was like a child in a sweet shop and just couldn’t help myself. I took my 5mg Lorazepam and 10x 5mg Valium. This adds up to 90mg benzo if I’m not mistaken.

My question is will this reset my taper/tolerance and will I have to start again. Will I go through a withdrawal process again until I stabilise.

I’m so mad at myself right now if I didn’t have family to worry about I would hang myself tonight.

Please help.

Abusive father neglects children to post at Benzo Buddies

Don't hurt me. I'm trying to stand up here.
« on: February 09, 2016, 08:40:23 pm »

[Buddie]

It seems I get the “I’ve had it!” speech when I act a little stronger.
Yesterday, I step up and start being a dad. Working with the kids to learn some table manners in this case. […] sees it and recognizes I’m feeling a little better. Last night I get the “its just so all consuming I can’t take it anymore, maybe you should move out”

So now I’m… lift face off table…write post to BB…return face to table.

Oh yea … “all you do is sit around and read about benzos”
shame on me

sorry… having a real bad day and edited my post to try to remain on topic.
« Last Edit: February 09, 2016, 09:24:13 pm by [Buddie] »

“I fear that the doctor in the detox put some kind of device inside my brain”

My brain is ruined
« on: Today at 08:45:13 am »

TheBlackSabbath

Hi everyone  hope you all had a happy new year and are excited about the new year to come.I would just like to know if anybody has been ruined for life over this whole experience?I kind of feel like my brain just got fried and will never return to normal.I also constantly have this fear that anything will put me back into withdrawls again,I can’t even take a Tylenol without thinking it’s going to rev up my symptoms.it’s actually quite terrifying.I worry way to much nowadays.

Re: My brain is ruined
« Reply #1 on: Today at 08:53:19 am »

Heyjude

Happy New Year Blacksabbath…. I am 7mo. post benzos and still feel the fried brain effect. Alot of sx are gone but my brain just doesn’t feel right. I know…I know ..they say it takes time. But enough already!!!! Jude

Re: My brain is ruined
« Reply #2 on: Today at 09:20:44 am »

prettydaisys

oh yeah. every post i have made on this forum is about my brain. when i got home from the detox after the c/t all i said was ‘i really think i blew out my brains’ i am kindling now. it’s 9 months and my brain still feels like an undulating vinyl record that just won’t go down. it’s still feels like there is a flying saucer or a hockey puck in there which cause me to have the sensation’s of descending as if i was ski diving. i fear that the doctor in the detox put some kind of device inside my brain. it’s unbelievable!
i really hope it will heal one day and stop pounding. it beats, pulses, zaps and vibrates.

do you have any of these sensations? if so, it would be welcomed to please let me know so i don’t feel so alone. this is the first post i have seen in regards to just the brain. i’ve been looking for a post about it for 9 months.