Benzo addicts resentful of opiate addicts

My reaction to an opiod withdrawal video
« on: July 17, 2019, 09:52:19 pm »

[Buddie]

Just got finished watching a Ted talk by someone who had a rough time coming off of prescribed opiates.

He was on stage crying in the middle of his speech, and my first thought was “Cool story bro. Let me tell you about benzodiazepines”.

I know the opiod issue has a lot in common with the benzo issue and I’m not saying that opiod withdrawal isn’t awful or that we should look down on anyone who has had that experience, but it kind of bothers me that for years I have been dealing with something that most people claim is worse than opiod withdrawal, yet no one really wants to acknowledge that it is a problem.

Where is our Ted talk? At least everyone acknowledges the opiod issue and they are taking some steps to correct it, benzos are barely part of the prescription drug conversation.

Re: My reaction to an opiod withdrawal video
« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2019, 12:39:49 am »

[Buddie]

Where is our Ted talk?

Excellent question, […]! I’ve been wondering the same thing. Maybe since it’s not readily accepted quite yet that these drugs have been part of a “silent epidemic,” there’s fear in coming forward? Something is holding people back from full public acknowledgment and disclosure. I would certainly like that to end NOW.

I’d be a poor public speaker with horrible stage fright. But to have someone take that step of giving a TED talk would be a breath of fresh air!

Addict blames Klonopin after ending up in rehab for opiates

A year of an opioid addiction followed by a year of a Klonopin prescription
« on: March 07, 2019, 10:21:14 am »

[Buddie]

It has not been a good 2 years. January 2017 I began abusing Oxycodone and other opioids. I knew I was heading down a dark tunnel but I didn’t care. I was severely depressed and it was the only thing that made me feel better. That didn’t last long. I spent about a month in rehab in November 2017 and got clean. From opiates, at least. When I got out of rehab my anxiety was so bad I ended up going to the emergency room and they gave me a shot of Valium and a bottle of 90 1mg Clonazepam and told me to take up to 3mg a day as needed. I quickly realized that was too high of a dose for me and ended up taking 1 to 1.5mg a day. I’m currently taking 2mg a day and I feel like my anxiety and depression have returned with a vengeance. I spend a majority of my time sleeping, smoking weed, and watching TV. I have no urge to hang out with any of my friends and have become a recluse. Everything feels like a chore, even eating. I’m 6 foot and 150 pounds. I’m in college and I can barely make it to class. Even when I go I feel like it’s pointless because I don’t remember anything. I feel like Clonazepam has ruined my memory. I used to be able to get all A’s and a few B’s in my classes without studying much. Now I study more than ever and I can barely remember the last page I read. While I was abusing opiates I definitely was not in a good state of mind and it completely fried my dopamine receptors but I feel like the effects Klonopin have had on my brain are even worse. I’m only 22 and feel like if I stay on this drug I’m gonna have Alzheimers by 30. I’m dedicated to tapering off but taking it slow. I just have a few questions I’d like to ask the community if anyone has some input. How long do the memory problems last? Do you notice your memory start to “come back” once getting off benzos? What are some tips to help improve benzo induced memory loss? Thank you for taking the time to read this.

– […]

Addict ditches wife to marry cult

Losing Marriage
« on: March 01, 2019, 11:16:21 pm »

boomboxboy21

Has anyone felt the withdrawal process caused you to completely lose the connection you had with your spouse or girlfriend/boyfriend? I am pretty worried my wife and I aren’t going to make it through this. We never have fun together anymore, even though we do try and do things, but it just feels forced now. We tried to play darts the other night and we both acknowledged that we weren’t having fun. It honestly feels like we are still together because we have a child now. All […] do is talk about what I’m going through and she doesn’t want to hear it, which I understand, and even when I don’t talk about, I feel like we have nothing to talk about or do together.

Father goes on bender as horrific cult abuse story of parents doing drugs in front of kids surfaces

Reintroduce myself after two years
« on: February 24, 2019, 01:48:49 pm »

[Buddie]

First of all I’m sorry for the run on sentence….I wasn’t completely sure where to post this but I need some kind of answers, I struggled for months after a cold turkey wd but eventually the sky opened and I was fine and back to my normal self besides benzos I would have an occasional drink but I was never a hard drinker and I started smoking marijuana regularly again, last week we had a run in with cps and I had to quit smoking bc my wife’s therapist told them we smoked in front of our children which wasn’t true we smoked in the garage whenever our son was awake anyway I turned to liquor for that week of not smoking I probably drank a bottle of crown a few beers and a bottle of wine or two then during the weekend I went to a ski resort with the guys from work and I drank HARD harder than ever I remember ordering a whole bottle of wine at one of the dinners needless to say I haven’t been feeling great and the symptoms are mimicking my ct withdraw slightly less in every way but I’m still in agony in and out of the dr and hospital most of this week just for them to say blood work and ekg are fine just high bp is the only thing they can see which leads me to my question did this onset some alcohol/ protracted benzo withdrawals or am I dying?? I’m so scared and feel like poo

Would you want your child taught by someone addicted to Klonopin (who is also in a cult)?

Worried About Taking Time Off Work
« on: January 08, 2019, 04:33:42 pm »

[Buddie]

Hey all. I know I have complained about my job many times on this forum. It is my job as a high school teacher that had me on Klonopin for many years, and it is my job that made me want to go back on the poison January 2018 for 2 1/2 months. Those 2 1/2 months led me to this hell I am in now nearly ten months later.

I am going to take some time off work starting January 21st at the end of the semester. At first, I was excited about it and felt a slight sense of relief, but as the time draws closer, I am getting worried about having too much downtime. I am mostly suffering from depression with intrusive thoughts which has basically created a fear of being alone. For that reason, I will probably go live with my parents and making routine trips to visit my wife and daughter with a friend or my family. Just venting here. I will have to find things to do to keep my mind occupied at all times. I’m hoping the time off will at least lead to better sleep and more opportunities to exercise.

Chris Cornell’s history of drug abuse swept under carpet by deranged Benzo Buddies kooks screaming justice

Chris Cornell’s Family Sues Psychiatrist over Ativan
« on: November 01, 2018, 09:30:25 pm »

[Buddie]

Justice
https://variety.com/2018/music/news/chris-cornell-widow-files-malpractice-suit-soundgarden-1203017603/

Admin might need to move this but not sure where it goes.

Re: Chris Cornell’s Family Sues Psychiatrist over Ativan
« Reply #1 on: November 01, 2018, 09:46:27 pm »

[Buddie]

imo, attorneys sue where ever there is a chance for monetary settlement. cornell’s wife knew he was taking lorazepam, he told her on the phone shortly before his death that he had taken a few extra doses. why didn’t she/he take appropriate actions in regard to his addiction/drug seeking behavior before his death? the rx’s written to him (940 mg over 20 months) are about 1.5 mg/day, not an excessive dosage. the toxicology autopsy report indicated 4 mg lorazepam, barbiturates (where did he get these?), and other substances. yes, suicide ideation is a symptom associated with benzodiazepines but not any more so for cornell than for you or i. as i said imo, the attorney is seeking monetary settlement for a celebrity’s estate but, such action would likely not be brought by the estate of an average person.
« Last Edit: November 01, 2018, 10:46:35 pm by [Buddie] »

Re: Chris Cornell’s Family Sues Psychiatrist over Ativan
« Reply #2 on: November 01, 2018, 09:58:01 pm »

[Buddie]

Quote from: [Buddie] on November 01, 2018, 09:46:27 pm
imo, attorneys sue where ever there is a chance for monetary settlement. cornell’s wife knew he was taking lorazepam, he told her on the phone shortly before his death that he had taken a few extra doses. why didn’t she/he take appropriate actions in regard to his addiction/drug seeking behavior before his death? the rx’s written to him (980 mg over 20 months) are about 1.6 mg/day, not an excessive dosage. the toxicology autopsy report indicated 4 mg lorazepam, barbiturates (where did he get these?), and other substances. yes, suicide ideation is a symptom associated with benzodiazepines but not any more so for cornell than for you or i. as i said imo, the attorney is seeking monetary settlement for a celebrity’s estate but, such action would likely not be brought by the estate of an average person.
Can we please just enjoy the fact that someone is being held accountable and it’s making the news?

Re: Chris Cornell’s Family Sues Psychiatrist over Ativan
« Reply #3 on: November 01, 2018, 10:00:49 pm »

[Buddie]

enjoy if you want, but it may make it more difficult for those that are still alive & depend upon benzodiazepines for what ever legitimate purposes they use them or may need them in the future. also, I believe they are suing cornell’s treating physician, a cardiologist, not a psychiatrist: Dr. Robert Koblin is a cardiologist in Beverly Hills, California.
« Last Edit: November 01, 2018, 10:39:47 pm by [Buddie] »

A short history of Cornell's drug abuse

Turnbridge

Chris Cornell had long struggled with drug abuse and addiction. He started using around age 12, and by the time he was 13-years-old, he had become a daily drug user – of pot, pills, or whatever was easily accessible at the time. When he was just 14, Chris Cornell had a bad experience with PCP (a dangerous hallucinogen) and wound up with a longer-lasting panic disorder – agoraphobia. For the two years following that experience, Cornell rarely talked to anyone and did not have any friends. He had debilitating flashbacks of his PCP trip and stayed home most of the time. He became depressed.

Though Cornell stayed away from hard drugs for years after that, he drank heavily from adolescence to his late thirties. He was the child of two alcoholics and felt his own drinking problem was nearly inevitable. In a 2006 interview with SPIN magazine, Cornell explained that it was alcohol that eventually led him back to drug abuse:

“I think alcohol is what leads you to everything, because it takes away the fear. The worst drug experimentation I ever did was because I was drunk and didn’t care.” By everything, Chris Cornell primarily meant prescription medications. When things got hard at home, he hit the bottle and took some pills, leading him to an even more severe state of depression and addiction.

Wikipedia

In a 2006 interview, Cornell revealed that at the age of 14, he had a bad PCP experience and suffered from panic disorder and agoraphobia. “I had a bad PCP [angel dust] experience when I was 14 and I got panic disorder. And of course, I wasn’t telling anyone the truth. It’s not like you go to your dad or your doctor and say, ‘Yeah, I smoked PCP and I’m having a bad time.’ So I became more or less agoraphobic because I’d have flashbacks. From 14 to 16, I didn’t have any friends. I stayed home most of the time. Up till then life was pretty great. The world was big and I felt I could do anything I wanted. Suddenly, I felt like I couldn’t do anything. But in the isolation, my imagination really had time to run. I never did any drugs until my late 20s. Unfortunately, being a child of two alcoholics, I started drinking a lot, and that’s what eventually got me back into drugs. You often hear that pot leads to harder drugs. But I think alcohol is what leads you to everything, because it takes away the fear. The worst drug experimentation I ever did was because I was drunk and didn’t care.”

Benzo addicts trade pills for marijuana

Cannabis for Relief
« on: August 07, 2018, 02:01:15 am »

[Buddie]

Does anyone use cannabis for relief from withdrawal symptoms? If so, Indica or Sativa? Any particular strain for calm/pain etc…

Re: Cannabis for Relief
« Reply #1 on: August 07, 2018, 02:22:26 am »

[Buddie]

I use a 2:1 CBD THC oil tincture. The oil goes right under your tounge and it helps a lot with sleep and nighttime anxiety. I also smoke regular high grade marijuana, usually a nice kush, it really takes the edge off, sometimes it makes me paranoid if my anxirety is real bad but otherwise it helps!