I am on a boat in the middle of nowhere and I just want to publicly confirm that all psychs involved in psych torture should be strung up
— End Psychiatry (@EndPsychiatry) June 20, 2017
Flick was a rather colorful member of Andrew Bressler’s benzowithdrawal.com and Colin Moran’s benzobuddies.org (Colin would later ban him). As readers can see, from Flick’s cannabis-fueled ramblings below, he was crazy, and DEEPLY involved in cults, long before he ever took a benzo, or heard of Ashton…
Nice post NC it’s good to feel that connection with Spirit, wherever it comes from. Personally maybe I will get into a bit of “head” stuff here myself, since I am a man after all. I find it interesting that the three biggest teachers in my life of spirituality died in the past year. Maharishi, Sri Chinmoy, and Adi Da. I learned the TM thing when I was 22 and strung out on hard drugs and could not quit them. The TM worked for me. I did it for years. Now there is a lot of controversy around Maharishi too, like maybe he approache Mia Farrow sexually, but that has pretty much been debunked now. Certainly there has been a kind of “cult” grown up around him and the “yogic flying” seems pretty silly. Still TM saved my life and Maharishi and his teachings have been very beneficial to many. I can’t find fault with his ideal of “world peace” through the vehicle of many people meditating. Now it is is easy for the doubt mind to debunk anything “spiritual” and always throw out the baby with the bath water.
When I was a young ballet dancer in New York, I went to an intro with Sri Chinmoy and this was my first experience of a transmission guru. I felt an intense descending light and bliss in his personal company and also meditatiing on his photo. I became a disciple and wore all white and tried to be celibate and hung out with Carlos Santana and John McGlauphlin who were also disciples. Now I could not handle the sort of strictness with that guru and the two musicians also left in their own time, but that does not devalue Sri Chinmoy or his group in any way. he was very respected in the United Nations did some cool yogic tricks with lifting weights and so forth. His transmission was very real and quite blissful also. Also is was pretty cultic around him , as it always is around a charismatic transmission guru. people like to feel blissful.
I came across Adi Da in 1975 in New York when I heard “Garbage and the Goddess” on WBAI radio “IN the Spirit” by lex Hixon. I had a bad flu and was so moved by Da’s laughter, that I had a sudden and spontaneous lifting of the flu. I read the KOL and saw a “A diffiicult Man” and went to California to join the community. This was the only time I have every felt actual transmission from a book. I felt it in all of Adi Da’s books. For most people, including myself, a relationship with Adi Da is a mixed bag. I felt incredible light and clear and conscious bliss and also states of non separation or “non duality” around him just like he always described in his books. There was always a hard edge to being a disciple of his though. And a certain sort of “darkness” , but I would not necessarily say it is the community’s darkness or Adi Da’s darkness. We all have our dark side and I tend toward depression and fear myself. This is a pretty weird life. Of course Adi Da was not your usual teacher or guru. I know people who were around him in the inner stuff and some feel bad about it and others feel just fine. I never was around the inner stuff and only got the “trickle down” Some people say they were hurt. I don’t know any of them personally except for a couple ahnd they are both still very angry. So everyone who was ever with Adi Da is still trying to figure the whole thing out. many play the “gotcha” game and he is easy to play this game with because of his controversial activities. I think it is a good thing to call out abuses in any arena , whether it be political or spiritual. I would say that George Bush has dwarfed any guru in history with his abuse of the whole world . So is goes round and round and we always feel abused by life itself. But Adi Da has passed now, and people are still so angry that they are beating a dead corpse. Wow I would check out this anger thing.
I am pretty versed in the Traditions since I have studied extensively in Buddhism and under Tibetan lamas and also zen and vipassana. These are real practicing schools. I have never been much attracted to the Ramana lineage myself , partially because it can be pretty mental and I have seen the circus that Poonjaji created by creating all these mini gurus like Andrew Cohen and Gangaji, both of which I have seen and I feel to be real “talking school” so to speak, Just my opinion and preference,
But many love Ramana Maharshi and also Sri Nisardagatta and I respect that for their practice with their teachings. There is certainly and incredible radiance coming off the photos of Ramana and this is not to be discounted. I feel that your really can tell something about a teacher by their photo. This is an intuitive matter and not a mental one.
I have also spent quite a bit of tiime around Ammachi , the hugging saint, and there is a very strong transmission with her too. Of course, many people debunk her too. And certainly it is somewhat “cultic” around her. So what .
I gave lots of money to Adi Dam and to Adi Da personally although it was all underground. I am pretty broke now , but i do not regret it . I felt good about it at the time and felt like i was doing some good with my money rather than hoarding something that never really belongs to you to start with. Generosity is a founding principle of Buddhism. Money comes and goes, and we are closer to death every moment, Flick Rahke
Re: Health Anxiety « Reply #391 on: April 10, 2017, 07:16:03 am »
Hey […] .. here’s one to bring a smile to your face.. sad thing is it is all true ! This is even better than the smiling at yourself in the mirror each morning to see if you had had a stroke..!
Anyhow last night I woke up in the night and got up to go to the bathroom and noticed blood on the pillowcase… not a lot but enough to be scary on a white pillowcase , right where my mouth had been … could feel the fear just rush through me.. what on earth .. my mouth felt kind of sore , could it be a new type of stroke?? I had a small paper cut just at the side of my mouth that is taking a long time to heal.. I figure in the light of day I must have scratched it and it has bled a little.. added to that ,reflux and you have a messy pillowslip.. oh no , could I be that logical in the middle of the night ?? Not on your life.. I was bleeding internally , I was bleeding from an artery in my nose somewhere.. oh my goodness… funny now as I tell it but you can bet it wasn’t funny in the night … the sight of blood always scares the daylights out of me…. health anxiety in the extreme ….xx
“Many members are highly sensitive during withdrawal, hyper-sensitivity is itself a withdrawal symptom, and even something as simple as a ‘humorous’ emoji may be considered offensive by some.” – Benzo Buddies moderator
Antipsychotics are drugs that are used to treat symptoms of psychosis such as delusions (for example, hearing voices), hallucinations, paranoia, or confused thoughts. They are used in the treatment of schizophrenia, severe depression and severe anxiety. Antipsychotics are also useful at stabilizing episodes of mania in people with Bipolar Disorder.
Their main action is on dopamine receptors, reducing levels of excess dopamine. They may also affect levels of other neurotransmitters, namely acetylcholine, noradrenaline, and serotonin.
Older antipsychotics tend to be called typical antipsychotics, and antipsychotics that have been developed more recently are called atypical antipsychotics. Atypical antipsychotics are less likely to produce extrapyramidal side effects (such as tremor and Parkinson’s-like symptoms) and tardive dyskinesia (abnormal, repetitive facial movements). Atypical antipsychotics are also more likely to improve cognitive function. Clozapine (classed as an atypical antipsychotic even though it is quite an old drug) also improves delusions and hallucinations and reduces the risk of suicide.
- atypical antipsychotics
- miscellaneous antipsychotic agents
- phenothiazine antipsychotics
- psychotherapeutic combinations
Foggy and feel crazy « on: April 17, 2017, 05:03:15 pm »
Anyone struggle with having this mental block or cloud/fogginess in their brain and also feeling everything being off? Like I go to do something normal; i.e. take a bath and everything still feels weird and looks odd. I get such high anxiety that I feel I’ll just flip out. I honestly don’t know how to control this or make it go away. Please help with suggestions…..
“My father and mother, Genevieve, had a happy marriage of 39 years, until our mom (13 years his junior) passed away in 2009 of a brain tumor, likely brought on by the vaccines she’d received over the years, and the root canals, and the mercury fillings, and the nutrient-depleted food that she (like most Americans) had ingested over the years…“
"Big pharma MD's killed my father" « on: March 01, 2017, 01:59:29 am »
This is something that everyone with access to medical care should read. A very sad story and a reminder that we are all still vulnerable to another medical mess if we cannot speak for ourselves in the emergency room setting. I think we all need to get medical alert bracelets and always wear them as i dont see any other way to make sure that this never happens again…
If this is allowed.... please sign « on: December 29, 2016, 03:49:26 pm »
This is probably for US residents only…..
I know there is a lot of UK and other countries here….I wish you could sign but I don’t know if it would help
Can't handle this symptom any more « on: November 23, 2016, 07:21:31 pm »
I have bot posted on this forum too much before but right now my anxiety is ramped up sky high.
I am again experiencing the extremely upsetting symptom of wanting to bash my head against the wall that I understand from others can be a Klonopin w/d s/x.
It is showing no sign going away. And that is really, really upsetting and worrying me.
These feelings went away pretty much totally before, so logically then can do again but that is my intellect talking, not my heart. I find it hard to believe they will and all the while I am in the deepest possible distress.
I am losing faith that I can survive, my confidence is in tatters and I wonder how much more hell I have to go through before I get t a place of mental stability again, that I last had two months ago – although it feels much longer.
The onset of dark evenings and winter mean more time cooped up alone.
I have to get my anxiety levels down to ease the symptom I so dread, and writing this has made me realise I need to focus full time on me now to get a sense of balance back and resume my taper. Right now everything is on hold and it’s so distressing.
Re: Can't handle this symptom any more « Reply #1 on: November 23, 2016, 07:54:25 pm »
[…], I have no experience of Klonopin but I do know what it is like to be sobbing and banging my head on the refrigerator. And nobody can understand this unless they’ve been through it.
If you are feeling the worst you’ve ever felt then it will get better. It will probably be a while before you are properly better but the crisis reaches its peak and then falls again. So listen to your intellect.
I thought I couldn’t go on any more earlier today but, for better or worse, I am still here.
We don’t have any choice, do we?
I hope you feel better soon. […] x
Re: i wouldn't put it past Big Pharma to do this... « Reply #49 on: November 27, 2016, 07:17:49 am »
The U.S. military has been spraying chemical and biological weapons in open air testing over civilian populations since the 1940’s. They are called “vulnerability tests”. This is not a controversial statement. The military has admitted to this practice on many occasions and there’s plenty of documentation from the government to corroborate it.
Over the past decade, independent testing of Chemtrails around the country has shown a dangerous, extremely poisonous brew that includes: barium, nano aluminum-coated fiberglass [known as CHAFF], radioactive thorium, cadmium, chromium, nickel, desiccated blood, mold spores, yellow fungal mycotoxins, ethylene dibromide, and polymer fibers. Barium[F6] can be compared to the toxicity of arsenic.(4) Barium is known to adversely affect the heart. Aluminum has a history of damaging brain function. Independent researchers and labs continue to show off-the-scale levels of these poisons.
Then our sky was a gorgeous, deep blue. Clouds were a beautiful assortment of shapes. The sun was glorious. But people under 30, may not have a real sense of recollection about looking up every day and seeing this panoramic magnificence. Most of them are too busy texting or chatting on their cell phones.
In all these valuable reasons for not addressing this human crisis, the one that Dr. Kilburn has not addressed directly is the chronic assault of breathing/absorbing these now billions of tons of hazardous aerosolized chemicals and heavy metals over more than a decade without our informed consent. When one does not look for or address primary causes, then other issues can be blamed. This, on top of a government’s silence or refusal to respond and the corporate media’s complicity, make for an extremely dangerous combination that puts us all at grave and daily risk. As brain function is diminished, and other things are blamed for it, any population is easier “to control.”
If, however, millions of people are already on prescription pharmaceuticals to “calm them down” [long term, what is this doing to their ability to think clearly?] and, in addition, are breathing poisoned air rife with mind-distorting chemicals, then how clearly (if at all) is anyone able to think? How can anyone feel well and safe, if the very air we breathe is deliberately poisoned and is affecting our ability to think cogently?