“I will probably cause a storm of protest but I have got to say that although I have gained so much support and love through this group, I have also been scared witless. So many do’s and dont’s. I’ve been afraid to eat the foods I love. Afraid to take a supplement. Afraid to have a glass of wine with a meal. Afraid to take a pill when I felt I needed to. I felt inadequate because I couldn’t cope with all the w/d symptoms and yet others were soldiering on after years of suffering. I was terrified at the symptoms people had and I identified with them. Every symptom I got I blamed on valium. I reached a point where I realised valium was ruling my life as it had when I was in the depths of addiction. I decided to say ‘no more’. Yes… I’ve taken an antidepressant. I’ve slept for the first time in months and feel a whole lot better. I’ve had a glass of my favourite wine with a meal. Wonderful... I’m living again. I had no adverse reaction. I’ve had ice cream, cake, chocolate. No reaction. I have some quality in life. I’m not sitting waiting for the day I might wake up and think I feel better today. I might be too old to enjoy it. It might never happen. We are all so very different. Please find your own path. Trial and error. You may not have to give up all the things that help to make life a bit more worthwhile. I’m hoping this helps someone.”
One cult member's response:
“While I understand you saying you were afraid of many things you have been cautioned about here, some stories are very scary. We as admins have to walk a tight rope of not wanting to hurt or discourage anyone, but for the greater good of the community here we must also take a stand against wd antagonists. But I’m sorry I just have to say something here… while everyone is different, it is extremely ridiculous to think that you are going to heal if you keep throwing gasoline on your recovery. Eating chocolate or drinking caffeine is one thing, but to tell people it is alright to drink and take random valium or anti-depressants is another! This is so completely irresponsible! While you may not feel any ill effects, that does not mean you are not maligning your recovery time. Alcohol is a liquid benzo! It does not make it more innocent because you drink a glass with your dinner. At only 4 months off you are doing a disservice to your recovery, and this is not just my opinion. We can only go by what we have learned and the Ashton Manual was written based on more than 12 years of clinical experience from Dr. Ashton dealing with people in withdrawal and recovery. If you do not want to wait until you are healed to drink that is your business but please to not advocate that this is something everyone should just go ahead and do. Taking extra doses of valium or random anti-depressants are like playing with fire as well.”
WTH IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE? « on: June 25, 2017, 12:45:03 am »
There are people out here REALLY hurting and no one responds even though over 60 people read this persons thread? I don’t get it, is it too damn much to write a word or two?
DO YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS WHEN YOU WERE NEW HERE AND WERE HURTING AND PEOPLE READ YOUR CRY FOR HELP AND NO ONE RESPONDED? OR DID YOU ALL FORGET OR NEVER HAVE THAT PROBLEM OR YOU JUST DON’T CARE ANYMORE?
sorry this shit pisses me off!!
« Last Edit: June 25, 2017, 01:10:15 am by [Buddie] »
How do you parent in withdrawal? « on: May 21, 2017, 12:02:25 am »
I have not been able to do anything for my son since this happened to me. I worry that if I don’t get better, he will be taken from me. How do people even parent in this kind of mental decline?
Re: How do you parent in withdrawal? « Reply #1 on: May 21, 2017, 05:28:56 am »
You don’t know how long this will go on.
It might be best to make an agreement with someone you trust
who can be ready in case things at home become unsustainable
and too difficult for your son.
I assume you are doing all the right things, but things might not work out in time.
Surgery « on: April 26, 2017, 07:28:52 pm »
May 9 I’m supposed to have surgery on my left ankle, and they will be using general anesthesia to sedate me during the surgery. I’m 12.5 months out since jumping and still very symptomatic. Cog fog, headaches, balance issues seem to be the most intolerable of my current symptoms, and I’m worried that the drugs they use to sedate me will set me back and potentially make me worse. I was wondering if anyone has any experience with surgery during the recovery phase and if it had any adverse effect on their brain? I will cancel the surgery if needed. I don’t want any setbacks.
Re: Surgery « Reply #1 on: April 26, 2017, 07:32:04 pm »
I would like to know this too. I hope somebody will have some answers for you.
Love and healing
The rest of the internet has glowing positive reports about benzos. « on: April 19, 2017, 01:26:19 am »
It seems that the rest of the internet loves benzos and does not share the negative experience that we do. They don’t believe in side effects. They don’t believe in withdrawal syndrome.
They either don’t withdrawal at all or have a minor 2 week withdrawal, and this is with heavy doses. Some have gone on and off of the meds over decades, dozens of times and never experienced kindling or any problem going off whatsoever.
I’m in several support groups for issues like insomnia and IBS. Whenever a question comes up about what meds they’re taking or what meds cold be helpful, benzos are always eagerly suggested. Whenever I warn about the dangers of benzos, 10 people come to the aid of the person who mentioned the benzo to argue against me.
I have been banned from groups. I have been told I am fear mongering, am negative, am lying, am selling something, or have an underlying disease, and that I’m wrong. It is so frustrating. What is going on here?
Are we really a like a 5% minority of super sensitive people with weak gaba function or diseases? (5% LOL not even close, try something like 0.000001% of all benzodiazepine users – editor)
Re: The rest of the internet has glowing positive reports about benzos. « Reply #1 on: April 19, 2017, 02:05:10 am »
My doctor says that what I went through with Klonopin was rare. However, coming on this board assures me that I am not the only one who has suffered horrific effects from benzos. I’m curious as well to know the percentage of people that go through what we have gone through with benzos.
Re: The rest of the internet has glowing positive reports about benzos. « Reply #2 on: April 19, 2017, 05:58:28 pm »
Its true. The majority of people have few problems getting off benzos. But you were banned, so that’s good because they were not good sites for you to be on. “I Don’t Want to Belong to Any Club That Will Accept Me as a Member.” Groucho Marx. lol.
Becoming more addicted with taper plan « on: April 07, 2017, 01:08:02 pm »
I have recently startet a taper plan after getting adviced that my original plan by going cold turkey was not the smartest idea.
As i have not made a sig yet ill quickly explain what dose ive been on previously and for what period:
Been on Valium for about 1 year, I do not however take it everyday, on average I have been taking it 5-6 days a week.
My doses for the past 4 months has varied between 15-35mg the days I have taken it (I have only taken it based on what I feel I need when I would experience social anxiety). I have also been on Valium in the past, then on smaller doses (max 10-15mg) and maximum 3 months time. I have cold turkey then without any problems.
Four days ago I started a taper plan with 10mg a day, (2,5mg in morning, 2,5mg afternoon, and 5mg night). Prior to this I was going cold turkey for about 9 days with two “rescue doses” in total of that period, first one being 10mg and 2nd being 15mg, so 25mg total in those 9 days.
I have not experienced any side effects with my taper plan so far, except for slighty “cloudy mind”.
My problem with the taper plan however is that I more and more feel like I am building up a much bigger addiction to the drug with my taper plan as I now know I absolutely need to take it to certain times, and it was not like this before at all, where i would just take it based on my actual needs. Now I know that when I wake up I will need to take a dose, around dinner time ill take another dose and before going to bed ill take a third dose. I truly feel like I am getting alot more addicted to the drug than I have been before, and I am really afraid that this is going to make it alot harder to quit it.
Does anyone have any suggestion to what I could do in my situation to make it better not worse?
Why is Ashton the holy grail of taper methods in the UK...... « on: August 25, 2016, 11:26:11 pm »
….yet not embraced by US doctors when tapering patients off benzo’s? I am so curious about this and am new here. I’m all ears!
“It was even suggested that Valium should be added, like fluoride, to the drinking water. Together people would be blessed both with tranquility and strong teeth.” – Prof. Heather Ashton, December 2011
W-BAD – July 11th (Ashton’s birthday)
The date was designated (by whom?) in recognition of Ashton’s contributions to the anti-psychiatry / anti-doctor / conspiracy theory cause over so many decades – together with all of the help (encouraging them to waste years, sometimes decades, of their lives on useless tapers) she has given to so many people around the world. She treated less than 400 people but what the hell…
Participation can be as simple as:
- Telling any one person that July 11 is World Benzo Awareness Day (could be yourself if agoraphobic)
- Suing your doctor
- Sharing something on the Internet (the one activity the kooks are able to do no matter how bad their wave is)
- Donating $1000 dollars, or more, to Scientology or its front group CCHR
- Attacking a psychiatrist (or other doctor), nurse, office receptionist, family member of Big Pharma employee, total stranger, etc.
- Putting a pamphlet in someone’s letter box, handing one out, leaving one on a bus seat or something…
Avoid words like:
- Addicts, users, abusers, etc.
- Misuse, abuse, use, etc.
- Benzos (even this abbreviation has been bastardized in some media so need to be careful – BZ / BZD / BDZ are acceptable medical abbreviations)
- Hail Xenu