Jelly legs worse than benzo belly?

Alright, this is not just jelly legs
« on: July 26, 2019, 09:22:11 pm »

[Buddie]

So I am between 2-3 months out of C/t rapid detox (had some overlap of drugs they gave in hospital)
As awful as it gets with a host of symptoms, but my most profound physical symptoms is beyond jelly legs.
My legs started out where I couldn’t lift them or walk at all, and they began contracting nonstop, the clenthcing was very large and you could totally see it happening….they did this for 6 weeks straight without EVER stopping even if I slept, which most of time I didn’t. They then started calming down a bit and have settled into a constant movement of muscles and twitching (both surface and deep)
They have still never stopped. When I walk (can walk from room to room and stand in shower) they just start getting worse.
So here I am, cannot walk on them to make them stronger and they cannot ever rest to heal. Because even when resting them….they are moving. It is an unbelievable, impossible situation.
Anyone relate?
Btw…I am a mom and was a competitive athlete until the last 10 months of all these meds. Not being active is hindering my recovery, and we all know that these drugs have destroyed life as we know it. But not being able to use my legs…is stopping me from everything

Twitching and jerking harmless?

Article about twitches and jerks
« on: May 03, 2018, 03:44:41 am »

[Buddie]

It seems potassium, magnesium and stay hydrated helps. I think this is well known hee but I link this article anyway. Twitches seems to by harmless despite they are annoying.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-5684163/What-random-twitch-plagues-arms-eyes-dont-shut-eye.html

Another Ashton failure: Nine months off benzos and jerking around like a fish out of water

Never a 100% window... Normal?
« on: June 10, 2016, 11:40:51 pm »

[Buddie]

I’m 9.25 months off and have yet to experience a 100% window. For me, a 100% window would be to sleep an adequate amount of hours and to NOT have any Hypnic jerks while trying to fall asleep. My best window to date was a night of 7 hours sleep, but still had a few little jerks going to sleep and a lot once I woke and tried sleeping again. Never a day without my worst symptom and feel like I may never be rid of them… Especially since I’m experiencing relentless jerks 75% of the time, maybe getting up to 4, sometimes 5 hours each night.

Anyway, I’m hoping I’m not alone in having never ending horrible symptoms… Without a single day off! Can anyone relate? Especially if you are as far out as me? Hopefully ill hear from those who were like me, but are now getting big windows!

Cult member tapes forehead and eyes to stop the twitching

Does anyone have or had this? Please Respond...so Desperate
« on: June 07, 2016, 02:52:54 pm »

[Buddie]

Hello everyone:

I don’t know if right place to post and i hesitate to do so but I’ve had severe physical symptoms and am looking to see if anyone else has experienced this where it has gone away or at least gotten better…. the ones most distressing and pure torture and where I […] can’t do this anymore are:

Muscle contractions and spasms in forehead …above eyebrows and in between eyebrows….. You can visibly see the muscles move and go up and down back and forth…. Pure pure utter torment ( the worst pain you can imagine)

Eyes involuntarily close shut and squeeze and jerk for seconds moments at a time

Nerves underneath left eye especially, jump upwards, shake ,vibrate and pull and cramp like crazy (and also inside of eye) sometimes staying in a locked position

Jaw involuntarily jerks back and forth from left to right; teeth grinding into each other, sometimes clenches really tight

The muscles in my lips will contract and pull from left to right and also tick …sometimes they will spasm where the muscles in my my lips are making my mouth pull all the way to the left
The muscles in my bottom lip will actually pull my bottom lip inside out and downwards and will pull and contract and vibrate

Sometimes its so severe on my left side that the forehead eyes jaw and mouth will all contract at once..TORTURE and pain.

I actually have to wear tape on my face to minimize the movement and pain

My chin also spasms up and down

These are sobad at times I have to put athletic like tape under my eyes and forehead to minimize the pain.and movement.

None of my mouth movements are so much as grimacing as they are more like muscles […] spasming and contracting out of control….

I am so desperate for encouragement as I can no longer bear it….. As you can imagine I have been housebound for 14 months …..I could never go out in public this way…. It is hideous…

The hopelessness and despair are off the charts…. I have the most severe health anxiety a person could ever have….my heart constantly feels like its going to jump out of my chest

I wish I had the ability to be of more encouragement and help to others because that is exactly what I would be doing but I can’t even help myself… I feel so alone with all of this…

If someone can be kind enough to give me some hope and encouragement or ideas of what I could to. I rarely if ever get relief….. I am on the verge of having a breakdown from all the symptoms…….
This has devestated my life…. I can’t sustain this…

thank you to anyone who has read and can sympathize…..

Is the need to hurt someone really a benzo withdrawal symptom? Involuntary yelling? Laughing hysterically?

involuntarily yell out loud and symptoms such seazure
« on: April 07, 2016, 12:19:57 pm »

[Buddie]

I’ve calculated with doses of xanax, I’ve used 9 years for social phobia and panic attacks. I used other drugs from the group of antidepressants, antipsychotics and antiepileptics, on end off. Before every social situation, I increased the dose, because of the phobia and panic which is always held in front of others, and I would be ashamed. At first it took 2 mg xanax at once to come to 20mg 2 years ago. Call me a drug addict now, it would be too much for me. I’ve never worked out hedonistic initiative, only I could function. Before my last tablet, I used Prozac and Eftil, antiepileptik. Both I threw in a month. Last year, before the jump when I’m home I used 2.5 mg, at once and when I expose social situation 5-6mg at once, continuous up and down.If I was alone at home,I am not at all neaded xanax,but would immediately arise widhdrowal. All 9 years, I used High doses at once-lower doses of 3-4mg at once,I’m in social situations-I’m alone at home, continuous up and down. I reduced xanax 26 days. Today I am 6 months and 2 days off. From the first day I have seazure, but I’m awake. Aggressive throwing body, with loud involuntary yelling,these attacks lasted 6 hours,rage, screaming into a pillow, cry, but it sounds like laughing hysterically…PLEASE HELP ME..Is this normal?Is this seazure or weight widhrowal???

Re: involuntarily yell out loud and symptoms such seazure
« Reply #1 on: April 07, 2016, 01:18:29 pm »

[Buddie]

I can not stand this anymore, every day I have these attacks. Sweating, the need to break something or hurt someone, I’m falling off the beds to muscle spasms and shaking. When it passes the rest of the day and night I still yell- twitch-yell. As if someone had turned me into electrisity work- does not work. This symptom is here for more than 3 months. A violent throwing body and head over 56 days and night. One month ago I shook my head to the left to the right like I was at rock concert. It was hard for me all this to tell. I barely wrote this. I can barely walk, I do not talk to anybody, because of the sensitivity to sound and I have all the possible symptoms on list and more. I’m new to the forums and i’m looking for support and advice. Would help me gabapentin? Are they real seazure, What if we damages the brain? Thanks in advance everyone. God help us!

Kooky Monday: Cult member claims thirteen doses of Klonopin, spread over a month and a half, caused head to jerk about like Linda Blair in the Exorcist

Will my head jerks and twitches eventually go away?
« on: January 18, 2016, 07:43:34 am »

[Buddie]

I’m 27 days benzo free hallelujah! I was taking a 0.5 mg dose of clonozepam every 2-3 days for a month and a half in all I think I only dosed like 13 times in a month and a half.Im still having head jerks and muscle twitches/spasms.Do these go away and is the head jerking a common side affect?Because when I start having my moments of doubt I’ll be thinking it’s anything from MS to CNS damage even though this didn’t start happening until day 7 off clonozepam. Just really frightened about the head jerks will they eventually go away and is it most likely the side affects of not having the clonozepam in my system?

Nail biting is more than a bad habit: Experts to classify the addiction as a mental disorder

Millions of people around the world suffer from a self-mutilating and often painful addiction to biting their nails, which can be harder to quit than smoking cigarettes, but is often overlooked as a relatively benign habit.

Medical experts are now taking a closer look at the addiction and have decided to change its classification from a mere habit to a full-fledged obsessive-compulsive disorder.

The American Psychiatric Association is preparing to change the designation of nail biting from not otherwise classified, to obsessive compulsive disorder in its upcoming issue of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, NBC News reported.

Habits that are commonly associated with OCD include repetitive hand-washing and hair-pulling. The disease is characterized by unreasonable thoughts and fears that lead to such repetitive behaviors.

The occasional chewed nail isn’t an indication of the disorder, medical experts assure.

“As with hair pulling and skin picking, nail biting isn’t a disorder unless it is impairing, distressing, and meets a certain clinical level of severity,” Carol Mathews, M.D., a psychiatrist at the University of California, San Francisco, told NBC News. “That is not the vast majority of nail bitters,” she said.

Nail chewing is considered severe when the habit becomes destructive – when it impairs use of the hands or leads to repeated infections. Sometimes a nail-biter’s hands and fingers can become infected, but more often, the habit leads to an increased risk of contracting colds and other illnesses because it encourages the spread of germs from the nails to the lips and mouth.

Nail biters looking to quit their addiction may find they are less inclined to stick their fingers in their mouths if they put lemon juice or hot sauce on their digits. Former nail biters who quit the habit said it also helps to wrap nails in tape or Band-Aids and to keep their hands well-manicured.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2227357/Nail-biting-bad-habit-Experts-classify-addiction-mental-disorder.html

A Benzo Buddies Christmas

Christmas Carols for Buddies

Micro-Tapering — The Twelve Years of Tapering
On my first year of tapering my one true guru Ashton sent to me
A giant boatload of diazepam
On my second year of tapering my one true guru Ashton sent to me
two trips to the nuthouse
and a giant boatload of diazepam
On my third year of tapering my one true guru Ashton sent to me
three electroshock treatments
two trips to the nuthouse
and a giant boatload of diazepam …

Borderline Personality Disorder — Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

Manic — Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and …
Agoraphobia — I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn’t Leave My House

Social Anxiety Disorder — Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate

Schizophrenia — Do You Hear What I Hear, the Voices, the Voices?

Oppositional Defiant Disorder — Santa Claus is Coming to Town
You better not cry – Oh yes I will
You better not shout – I can if I want to
You better not pout – Can if I want to
I’m telling you why – Not listening
Santa Claus is coming to town – No he’s not!!
Multiple Personality Disorder — We Three Kings Disoriented Are

Dementia — I Think I’ll Be Home for Christmas

Bad Wave — Walking In a Winter Wonderland Miles from My House in My Slippers and Robe
Involuntary Psychiatric Hold — Over the River Aand Through the Woods To The Funny House We Go

Paranoia — Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me

Personality Disorder — You Better Watch Out, I’m Gonna Cry, I’m Gonna Pout, Maybe I’ll Tell You Why

Narcissistic — Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

Attention Deficit Disorder — Silent Night, Holy
OOOOOOOOh look at the Froggy
Can I have chocolate
Why is France so far away?
Doctor Hate — I Saw Mommy Kissing Dr. Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House

Amnesia — I Don’t Remember If I’ll be Home for Christmas

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder — Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells …

5150 — Away in A Psych Ward