« on: April 02, 2021, 03:24:15 pm »


My husband has decided he wants a separation, and possibly a divorce. He can’t handle this, and is very mean and unsupportive in my quest for help. He has had enough and it’s only been a month. Anyone doing this on their own? How do you manage? I have nowhere to go, and nobody to talk to. I’m not working, and have very little income. He has yelled, screamed, and said some really nasty things to me. I went through a divorce 14 years ago because of horrific abuse, and that was really hard. I didn’t cope well and turned to drinking for years. I’ve been sober since 2013. I’m afraid I’ll fall apart again. I’ll be honest I took 2 A after the fight and I regret it. I just don’t know what to do or how to cope. This is overwhelming me. Have any of you gone through a separation, or divorce during wd? How did you do it? I am so defeated I feel like I will just give up. I am not as strong as many of you and tend to isolate and avoid anything painful. I have a long history of Ptsd, and trauma. Any advice is appreciated. Please no negative comments. I feel low enough


Disturbing nightmares TRIGGER WARNING
« on: November 18, 2020, 09:31:00 pm »


I’m reducing valium was on 75mg in 2016 down to 23mg cut last night, so too early to notice anything from cut.
I also take micronised progesterone which is cross tolerant to the valium.
I also have terrible actual-factual real life problems I wont go into.
Anyway, I woke up around 6am, took my second dose of valium as I did not want to get up that early, went back to sleep and had a really disturbing nightmare that is so awful I cannot imagine how my consciousness conjured it up. I will be very vague as it may freak some people out.
It was in a carpark and involved a man who had obviously lost his self respect as he was very dirty and doing something in a public place, he obviously had some medical complaint and he was putting his carnal desires before his personal hygiene, his self respect and the respect for who he was with.
That’s all I will say.
I hope this isn’t going to be the shape of things to come.
I sometimes have dreams where I am lost in some strange place and have to find my way home, I like dreams they tell me a lot about my state of mind.
This tells me I feel lost.
I dream that I am still taking EE which I haven’t taken for a long time and don’t intend taking again.
This tells me I am depressed and long to have a happy feeling, yet ecstasy is false chemical happiness.
The disturbing dream represents me as the man, not the carnal but but the bit who has lost thier self respect and motivation and pride.
I would be scared to go to sleep if I thought I would have dreams more disturbing than that.

Irrational fear of furniture forces Bigglesworth to sleep on the floor (furniturephobia can be treated with medication)

Was exposed to insecticides please help!!
« on: September 24, 2019, 04:02:41 pm »


Please, please no triggering comments. On Friday evening we had to have our master bedroom and bathroom and my sons room sprayed (baseboards) with insecticides due to carpet beetles. They said to not go in the room for 2 hours but we left the house for 24 to be safe. I am now in acute with horrific chemical anxiety, no sleep, can barely function because mental and cognitive are so bad. The product is no longer ‘airborne’ but something has gone terribly wrong!! I’m still tApering, I’m on.16mgs klonipin but now holding. Please, anyone help me!!! (The product the used was onslaught)
My husband is going to wipe the baseboards down tonight and I’m not sleeping in there but it’s sohard to even be in my house as I’m afraid to get worse!

Re: Was exposed to insecticides please help!!
« Reply #1 on: October 03, 2019, 03:10:53 am »


So sorry youre going through this. I can relate as I have severe chemical sensitivity, and cannot even be around new furniture without having breathing difficulties and over stimulation of my nervous system. I actually sleep on the floor in my bedroom with just a pile of pillows and some old blankets, because I am allergic to every new mattress I’ve tried. So much for claims of being hypoallergenic. All that memory foam stuff is a toxic nightmare for me.

I see this post is a week old so I hope you were able to get the situation under control and are feeling better.