“I woke up in the loony bin”

I'm not religious but I now believe in hell.
« on: August 22, 2018, 12:42:43 am »

[Buddie]

Hello, I have been on 2mg of klonopin for almost two years. I have panic disorder and bipolar 1. I have been on countless meds over the years for my bipolar and nothing seems to help I keep finding myself in mania. I was prescribed klonopin for my panic disorder and major anxiety following a series of bad events that happened in 2016.
On July 31st in a manic episode, I (stupidly) went and got drunk, and found myself in a very dark place and long story short I tried to overdose on my klonopin. I woke up the next day in the Looney bin on a 72 hour hold where they wouldn’t give me any klonopins but didn’t have any problem giving me 1 mg ativan every 4 hours to treat early withdrawal. I am now on day 18 of a cold turkey and I can’t even describe the hell i am feeling.
« Last Edit: August 22, 2018, 01:29:27 am by [Buddie] »

Headbangers vow to taper forever

Can't handle this symptom any more
« on: November 23, 2016, 07:21:31 pm »

[Buddie]

I have bot posted on this forum too much before but right now my anxiety is ramped up sky high.

I am again experiencing the extremely upsetting symptom of wanting to bash my head against the wall that I understand from others can be a Klonopin w/d s/x.

It is showing no sign going away. And that is really, really upsetting and worrying me.

These feelings went away pretty much totally before, so logically then can do again but that is my intellect talking, not my heart. I find it hard to believe they will and all the while I am in the deepest possible distress.

I am losing faith that I can survive, my confidence is in tatters and I wonder how much more hell I have to go through before I get t a place of mental stability again, that I last had two months ago – although it feels much longer.

The onset of dark evenings and winter mean more time cooped up alone.

I have to get my anxiety levels down to ease the symptom I so dread, and writing this has made me realise I need to focus full time on me now to get a sense of balance back and resume my taper. Right now everything is on hold and it’s so distressing.

Re: Can't handle this symptom any more
« Reply #1 on: November 23, 2016, 07:54:25 pm »

[Buddie]

[…], I have no experience of Klonopin but I do know what it is like to be sobbing and banging my head on the refrigerator. And nobody can understand this unless they’ve been through it.

If you are feeling the worst you’ve ever felt then it will get better. It will probably be a while before you are properly better but the crisis reaches its peak and then falls again. So listen to your intellect.

I thought I couldn’t go on any more earlier today but, for better or worse, I am still here.

We don’t have any choice, do we?

I hope you feel better soon. […] x