This is an urgent and life and death matter for me, because I will be literally in the street at the end of this month and I don’t think I can survive in the street with lyme disease.
I’m on the verge of becoming homeless and losing my precious 4 cats.
Wow $385 in the first two hours! Thanks!
The tofu was marinated in yeast and tamari and tasted kind of like chicken.
I need money to pay my past due bills and rent, and money to start a new online herbal tincture business for lyme disease patients. My good friend also manufactures the best CBD oil and wants me to market it online too. I also need money to continue all my lyme disease natural treatments.
I have been getting some nice donations today and hope to break $3000 today! My revised goal is $5000. which is a lot more realistic than $25,000 LOL
Thanks to all my devotee friends who have donated in the past day!
I felt like I was really in direct service to Beloved Adi DA.
I got to sit with Beloved Adi Da in the big hall, where He gave Darshan and answered questions from all, and even took complaints. It was a very very intense evening, but I felt His Transmission strongly.
I also need money for a down payment for a Prius so I can work for Uber while my business ramps up.
Almost broke the $3000 mark today It would be good to get to $3500 today because I know these gofundme things wear out fast LOL My new goal is $5000 , not $25,000
This is going great for one day! Thanks to all devotees helping!
Well, the link got shut down for a day, but I am glad it is up again. Part of my story was deleted, though
I pray that my campaign will pick up again soon. I am kind of stalled at $2387 and, now would like to bring in $5000 as a goal.
I remember very fondly being the cook and janitor at the original Big Wisdom school in Sleepy Hollow. All the kids were very young then and I loved talking with them.
I am grateful for my friend Roger setting this up for me on the Matrix. I started one also, but it all goes on Facebook, where a lot of devotees don’t spend any time.
I would love to make it to $4000!
Wow , my campaign has almost died out, but I would love to be able to still reach 4000 Thanks to all who donated and I hope there are a few out there I reached out to who will still chip in some and help me get to $4000! Thanks
I just need $550 more from this campaign, and I can start my tincture business and have a down payment for a Prius so I can work some that way driving in San Fran. I am not looking for handouts, really, just help to be able to make a living while I am still sick with lyme disease . Thanks to Bruce and Swanzie for the donations yesterday!
Any help for me and my cats would be most appreciated
- Cannabis users more likely to commit violent crimes, research has shown
- Study found there was a ‘more constant relationship’ between cannabis and violence than between alcohol or cocaine use and violence
- More than 20 US states have legalised cannabis for medical purposes
Flick was a rather colorful member of benzowithdrawal.com and benzobuddies.org (he would lated be banned). As readers can see, from his cannabis-fueled ramblings below, Flick was crazy, and deeply involved in cults, long before he ever took a benzo, or heard of Ashton…
Nice post NC it’s good to feel that connection with Spirit, wherever it comes from. Personally maybe I will get into a bit of “head” stuff here myself, since I am a man after all. I find it interesting that the three biggest teachers in my life of spirituality died in the past year. Maharishi, Sri Chinmoy, and Adi Da. I learned the TM thing when I was 22 and strung out on hard drugs and could not quit them. The TM worked for me. I did it for years. Now there is a lot of controversy around Maharishi too, like maybe he approache Mia Farrow sexually, but that has pretty much been debunked now. Certainly there has been a kind of “cult” grown up around him and the “yogic flying” seems pretty silly. Still TM saved my life and Maharishi and his teachings have been very beneficial to many. I can’t find fault with his ideal of “world peace” through the vehicle of many people meditating. Now it is is easy for the doubt mind to debunk anything “spiritual” and always throw out the baby with the bath water.
When I was a young ballet dancer in New York, I went to an intro with Sri Chinmoy and this was my first experience of a transmission guru. I felt an intense descending light and bliss in his personal company and also meditatiing on his photo. I became a disciple and wore all white and tried to be celibate and hung out with Carlos Santana and John McGlauphlin who were also disciples. Now I could not handle the sort of strictness with that guru and the two musicians also left in their own time, but that does not devalue Sri Chinmoy or his group in any way. he was very respected in the United Nations did some cool yogic tricks with lifting weights and so forth. His transmission was very real and quite blissful also. Also is was pretty cultic around him , as it always is around a charismatic transmission guru. people like to feel blissful.
I came across Adi Da in 1975 in New York when I heard “Garbage and the Goddess” on WBAI radio “IN the Spirit” by lex Hixon. I had a bad flu and was so moved by Da’s laughter, that I had a sudden and spontaneous lifting of the flu. I read the KOL and saw a “A diffiicult Man” and went to California to join the community. This was the only time I have every felt actual transmission from a book. I felt it in all of Adi Da’s books. For most people, including myself, a relationship with Adi Da is a mixed bag. I felt incredible light and clear and conscious bliss and also states of non separation or “non duality” around him just like he always described in his books. There was always a hard edge to being a disciple of his though. And a certain sort of “darkness” , but I would not necessarily say it is the community’s darkness or Adi Da’s darkness. We all have our dark side and I tend toward depression and fear myself. This is a pretty weird life. Of course Adi Da was not your usual teacher or guru. I know people who were around him in the inner stuff and some feel bad about it and others feel just fine. I never was around the inner stuff and only got the “trickle down” Some people say they were hurt. I don’t know any of them personally except for a couple ahnd they are both still very angry. So everyone who was ever with Adi Da is still trying to figure the whole thing out. many play the “gotcha” game and he is easy to play this game with because of his controversial activities. I think it is a good thing to call out abuses in any arena , whether it be political or spiritual. I would say that George Bush has dwarfed any guru in history with his abuse of the whole world . So is goes round and round and we always feel abused by life itself. But Adi Da has passed now, and people are still so angry that they are beating a dead corpse. Wow I would check out this anger thing.
I am pretty versed in the Traditions since I have studied extensively in Buddhism and under Tibetan lamas and also zen and vipassana. These are real practicing schools. I have never been much attracted to the Ramana lineage myself , partially because it can be pretty mental and I have seen the circus that Poonjaji created by creating all these mini gurus like Andrew Cohen and Gangaji, both of which I have seen and I feel to be real “talking school” so to speak, Just my opinion and preference,
But many love Ramana Maharshi and also Sri Nisardagatta and I respect that for their practice with their teachings. There is certainly and incredible radiance coming off the photos of Ramana and this is not to be discounted. I feel that your really can tell something about a teacher by their photo. This is an intuitive matter and not a mental one.
I have also spent quite a bit of tiime around Ammachi , the hugging saint, and there is a very strong transmission with her too. Of course, many people debunk her too. And certainly it is somewhat “cultic” around her. So what .
I gave lots of money to Adi Dam and to Adi Da personally although it was all underground. I am pretty broke now , but i do not regret it . I felt good about it at the time and felt like i was doing some good with my money rather than hoarding something that never really belongs to you to start with. Generosity is a founding principle of Buddhism. Money comes and goes, and we are closer to death every moment, Flick Rahke
"HAS ANYONE HEARD FROM PLEASEBEHERE"??? « on: June 03, 2017, 02:02:20 am »
I am wondering if anyone has heard from Please, she has not been on since May 1, this year. Please was having a rough time, but she would come on and ask for help and she read all she could to try to help her situation. For those who knew Please, really knew her, she was a caring person and was trying so hard to get off of the benzo that was making her so very sick. We shared some Pm’s and I know others heard from her also. Worried and hope that someone has heard from her and she is doing better, or just needed to get away for a bit.
Aaron Hernandez ‘wrote bible verse John 3:16 on his forehead and smoked synthetic marijuana before taking his life in his prison cell’
Investigators also looking at possibility he smoked K2 synthetic marijuana before hanging himself – the same kind he smoked after killing Lloyd. It is known to cause psychotic episodes
Multiple 'demons' finally catching up with 70 yr old.............help please!! « on: April 01, 2017, 01:15:56 am »
At 70 yrs of age, I am now finally realizing that my ‘demons’ are catching up with me and am considering taking them on [or not?].
I’ll list them in no particular order and hope that someone could advise me on how to prioritise my attack, or even IF I should address them at my age.
Benzos………….Xanax for near 30 years as prescribed by my friendly family Dr to relieve my stress from going thru a nasty divorce and insomnia. original dosage was 1mg, but over the years it has increased to 3mg and I take them religiously at 8pm, wake up a little groggy, but can function after a cup of coffee.
Alcohol………….3 to 4 drinks in the evening [every evening] no binge drinking
Tobacco…………..1 pack daily for most of my life
My physical condition……………
As expected, not too good. Many aches and pains, fatigue, respiratory issues [early COPD?], muscle weakness, night sweats, agonizing night muscle cramps, tinnitus, and more…
My mental condition…………..
Confusion, paranoia, isolation from friends and family, anxiety, depression, suppressed anger, feelings of worthlessness, occasional suicidal thoughts, ‘brain fog’ and memory loss [both common symptoms of hepC]
And to complicate my situation even more………….I just cleared the virus hep C after going thru the latest treatment and altho my blood labs reveal a normal liver I feel worse than I did before Tx. My liver had deteriorated to the point of early cirrhosis and altho ‘they’ say I am cured, I don’t feel that way at all.
So, IF I choose to slay my demons, then how should I approach this task??. In what order should I prioritise?? or all at once??
I am unable to enter into any rehab center for a total detox as I have a family who needs me, but this forum has shown me that it is possible to do it on my own. Also, I have my suspicions about the ‘rehab industry’ as I did find a few on line and got the impression that they all wanted me to sign up and the ‘sales person’ got a commission off me and/or my insurance company. Seemed like a scam to me and they all said that ‘it couldn’t be done at home or with peer to peer support like this forum.
Thanks in advance for any input, suggestions, or advise.
and am I the oldest guy on this forum??
« Last Edit: April 01, 2017, 02:22:32 am by [Buddie] »
Re: Can marijuana help through benzo withdrawal? « Reply #124 on: March 30, 2017, 12:26:47 am »
Marijuana elevates heart rate and therefore can trigger a panic attack. I was a daily pot smoker and 90 percent of the times I was great except for random bug outs. Klonopin took that edge off. Then when I was tapering in the fall I got massive attacks every time I smoked. My cold turkey was so bad in January I didn’t even bother trying it. I smoked one little hit the other night and my heart went[…]. I hear what you are saying about being hungry prior to smoking and how it can cause some anxiety that’s a real thing. But I don’t think pot is useful for benzo withdrawals. I love marijuana and I’m super sad to not be smoking it anymore. I don’t think it’s harmful, but I’d rather avoid a panic attack or chest discomfort. I may try some edibles at some point. I researched this to death because I so miss smoking it but from everything I’ve read it doesn’t seem conducive to the brain healing post benzos. If you try and it works for you congrats. Let me know how it goes. Lol