Christmas visit to psychiatrist ends in disaster

Psych mistake
« on: January 30, 2018, 01:58:23 pm »

[Buddie]

I went to see the psychiatrist just after Christmas. I have intrusive thoughts and she wanted to change my antidepressant to help this. So I had to come off 100mg Nortriptyline and she gave me six weeks to do that. My dose was made up of 4x25mg tablets per day. So I cut down to 75mg. I felt okay and was optimistic. However, ten days after I’d gone down to 75mg I felt worse than ever and my intrusive thoughts were completely out of control. Now I am barely functioning. I have talked to the psychiatrist and we agreed to go back to 100mg. I am seeing her again next Wednesday. But now I am stuck in bed and the situation is much worse. I don’t know what to do. Any ideas? Thanks.

Anti-psychiatry maniacs at Benzo Buddies play doctor, tell crazy woman to take magnesium tablet, forget fact she can’t feel her head or arms

Feeling insane
« on: December 10, 2017, 06:07:59 pm »

[Buddie]

Hey guys

Just need some help. Just feeling nuts. Like I can barely write this message. I feel zero connection with myself or reality. My intrusive thoughts of regret, fear and self loathing won’t stop!!! I can’t look in the mirror because it triggers obsessive thoughts about appearance and aging.

The physical stuff is bad enough, but this mental stuff will not stop!!!!

Starting to think this is NOT withdraw!!

Thanks in advance.
[…]

Re: Feeling insane
« Reply #1 on: December 10, 2017, 06:23:36 pm »

[Buddie]

I’m thinking this is not withdrawal either. I dont feel my arms and head, I feel extremely weak. I cant do anything, i’m Just afraid of dying.

Take care […], i’m here if you wanna talk about withdrawal or anything else if you’re borred

Re: Feeling insane
« Reply #2 on: December 10, 2017, 06:29:37 pm »

[Buddie]

Try a tablet of magnesium, 250 mg. It will make you drowsy and take the edge off. It works on the GABA, which is what is going on in your brain. The magnesium won’t hurt you at that dosage, and it will help you relax.

Best wishes. I’m not a doctor, but just one-quarter of a tablet works for me

Re: Feeling insane
« Reply #3 on: December 10, 2017, 07:59:43 pm »

[Buddie]

[…],
Thanks and sorry you’re suffering. I know it’s probably withdraw. It’s just SO strange.

Julianna,
I have not tried magnesium, but may give it a try.

Praying for healing or windows for all of us!! 🙂

Re: Feeling insane
« Reply #4 on: December 10, 2017, 09:57:26 pm »

[Buddie]

I know what you mean […]. I look in the mirror and have lost most of my hair and my skin is so dry and oily all th time. I’m hurting with strange anxiety in my chest and intense pain. It’s such a shit show of emotions and then often no emotions. I really have my doubts this is withdrawl as well today. Hurting all around

Two years off drugs and hypochondria fire rages out of control

Bodily Checking & Panic
« on: February 24, 2016, 07:27:03 pm »

[Buddie]

Hello, benzobuddies. Thank you for your postings and help while I’ve been in withdrawal.

I am 22.5 months off of Xanax and Klonopin with a month of reinstatement.

I am much better than I was a year ago, but my worst symptom is still devastating me.

I unconsciously check for physical symptoms such as bumps or vague pains, find one, catastrophize, and go in extremely severe panic. I know that I’m okay, but my mind will not shut off telling me that I’m not. I live with the constant fear of getting and having cancer.
Do any of you have these symptoms and have any strategies for coping with them.

ty

Kooky Monday: Bowel movements added to list of 90,000,000 benzo withdrawal symptoms

Strange spell yesterday
« on: February 15, 2016, 02:11:23 pm »

[Buddie]

Hello Everyone.  It’s been a while since I have been here. I jumped off Ativan 6 months ago. Doing okay for the most part but still getting waves every few days. Fortunately the waves don’t last long but I keep having the oddest symptoms. The most annoying is these intense butterfly sensations in the pit of my stomach. They come out of nowhere when I am having a good day and feeling totally calm and happy. They are shortlived but uncomfortable. I assume it’s just a wave of anxiety. I have been on a beta blocker for 18 months to keep my heart from racing. Heart racing was the reason that I got put on a benzo in the first place. Dr. thought I had an anxiety problem but it turns out that my thyroid was out of wack and I was swinging from hyperthyroid to hypothyroid. I am not on thyroid replacement hormone yet because my hypothyroidism is mild and not causing problems. Anyway had a very strange thing happen yesterday, and sorry if TMI. My tummy was rumbling right before I needed to go to the bathroom for a BM, (I’ve been having constipation) and my heart rate went up a bit. It scared me because that hasn’t happened in while being on the beta blocker. It wasn’t racing like it used to though, but I am used to my pulse being in the low 60’s now because of the beta blocker, so if it gets up to even 80 or 85 it feels like racing. So I went to the bathroom and had a BM and came back and sat down and my heart rate started to go back down, but then I started shivering and trembling like the chills you get with a fever but my body temp was normal. I felt like I was coming down with something. That lasted about 15 minutes and then went away and I was fine the rest of the day. It’s like once I had the BM, everything went to normal. So my question is, did the impending bowel movement trigger this weird spell, or is it benzo withdrawal? Have any of you every experienced anything like this?

Re: Strange spell yesterday
« Reply #1 on: February 15, 2016, 04:24:25 pm »

[Buddie]

Anyone? Hoping someone can help shed light on this and ease my mind. Thanks. 

Re: Strange spell yesterday
« Reply #2 on: February 15, 2016, 04:35:03 pm »

[Buddie]

Sounds like small panic attacks to me. The gut is where many feel the effects of a panic attack. Hard to say if it’s benzo related or your thyroid causing cortisol swings.

Re: Strange spell yesterday
« Reply #3 on: February 15, 2016, 05:27:35 pm »

[Buddie]

Hi DMom,

Maybe your body is readjusting to normal. But gave your body those symptoms while doing so. I too had panic near BM process for a short time a couple weeks back. I think it was withdrawal symptoms for me.

I’m at about 6.5 months from my jump. I’m hypothyroid and am on .075 mcg of levothyroxine. I see an endocrinologist the past couple of months and will continue to do so just to make sure my numbers are good and am on the correct level of meds. In the beginning of withdrawal my body went hypo to hyperthyroid and made things very difficult to deal with.

I had not really had any hunger feelings in my stomach for the longest time until lately. This morning I noticed I was really hungry and I was so happy to feel that sensation! Yay! This whole process really baffles me what our bodies have to go through to get us back to normal.

Glad things have calmed down for you and sounds like you’re getting better!

SIG LINE TERROR

Turning off user signatures
« on: December 30, 2015, 07:42:43 am »

[Buddie]

I noticed that I was obsessing too much with other users’ signatures and taper histories. I’ve turned that off, and it’s made me feel better….

Re: Turning off user signatures
« Reply #1 on: January 12, 2016, 09:58:17 pm »

[Buddie]

I’d like to make a suggestion for you- try a lightbox. It may be just the ticket you need to feel better.

Re: Turning off user signatures
« Reply #2 on: January 13, 2016, 09:20:51 pm »

[Buddie]

I agree about user signatures. They can really freak me out too. I stay away from the horror stories and stick with threads like Accentuate the positive. Also, when I started my taper 7 weeks ago I literally sat on my couch all day on benzo buddies. I now go on twice a day for fifteen minutes and get on with my life. We have no choice in what we are going through but we do have a choice in how we deal with it.

Re: Turning off user signatures
« Reply #3 on: January 20, 2016, 12:22:10 am »

[Buddie]

Thank goodness the signature lines are in small print. Many are way too lengthy and to me your entire history and tapering schedule from day one doesn’t belong there. I wish folks would modify their signatures. I just try to ignore these unless I have some reason to want to know a person’s back story. 

Kook eats Valerian Root, chugs coffee, watches Nurse Jackie and starts to shake all over while eating a $5.00 chicken sandwich

Time for a rant
« on: January 05, 2016, 09:09:23 am »

[Buddie]

So, the other day, Sunday my ears were still ringing so horrific that I decided to check out after the football game was over.
I decided to give things one last shot. I went to CVS and got a bottle of Valerian Root. It says not to take it if you are taking Xanax. I guess they don’t have severe tinnitus. It took about one day and the ringing became quite tolerable. The only problem was that then my brain didn’t know what to do with itself.
The Valerian Root gives me cravings and insomnia. But at least I’m not out in the garage with the car running.
So, I went out about 1:00AM this morning to get a cup of coffee for the cravings and started to watch a show called “Nurse Jackie.” It’s a Showtime production. Jesus. Every episode starts off showing her sniffing a line of Percocet and pulling off her wedding ring so she can cheat on her husband. And she also empty’s out packs of sweetnlow and fills them with crushed Percocet and brings them to the hospital where she works and dumps some in her coffee throughout the day. And at times during the show it pans into the bathroom showing her doing another line of Percocet. The show attempts to have her come off as cool, knowing it all with snappy answers and sarcastic comebacks. I actually found it offensive. Netflix has one – Californication. That glorifies drugs and alcohol abuse. Then you have – House MD. He’s cool because he’s addicted to Vicodin. You have TV producers making a ton of money glorifying addictions. I’m sitting here, it’s 4:00AM and I’m shaking all over eating a $5.00 chicken sandwich I purchased at a 24 hour gas station. How cool is that?
Then, my youngest daughter tells me that her husband is addicted to cocaine and left her for another woman. When I told her about my horrific tinnitus from trying to taper off Xanax she tells me that she is on a benzo “as needed.” I guess the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree after all. I advised her TWICE to be careful and that that kind of medication can sneak up on you. And that she didn’t want to end up like me.
Valerian Root is supposed to make you drowsy. Drowsy is good. I like drowsy. Instead it makes me feel like I’m bouncing off the walls. I was hoping for drowsy.
That’s the end of my rant.
« Last Edit: January 05, 2016, 09:20:56 am by [Buddie] »

Addict binges on drugs but blames Big Pharma?

I have everything: grades, looks, connections. What do you think is wrong with me?
« on: January 02, 2016, 07:46:25 am »

[Buddie]

I’m blessed with so much yet can’t seem to get my act together, it’s a shame.

– No motivation…
– addictive personality, tendencies to binge on things then abstain wether it be food, or a video game, or the monopoly game at McDonald’s
– I have girls throwing themselves at me but don’t pursue :idiot: :P
– I’m on 200mg Zoloft
I use drugs all the time, even though I’ve been getting cleaner and cleaner since getting arrested
– it runs in the family my cousin just died from overdose and my in uncle just got out of ICU for alcoholism
– OCD
– sketchy behavior

Etc…